We spend so much time talking about what women do. The invisible work, the emotional labour, the impossible balancing act. And all of that is true and worth naming. But underneath the doing is a being.

When we hold limits with children, we're not withholding care. We're teaching something real and important: that other people have needs, that those needs matter, that genuine care is not the same as unlimited provision. The parent who can never say no isn't giving more love. They're actually depriving their child of one of the most valuable lessons available.

The same logic applies to you.

Adults co-regulate with each other too. We always have. That friend who can hold a crisis without panicking. The colleague who makes you feel steadier just by sitting across from you. The person who lets you say the thing that's actually true without making you manage their reaction to it.