We measure summer by the highlights. The trips, the big days, the photographs. And those things are genuinely worth celebrating.

But the summers I look back on most warmly are not the ones with the most impressive itinerary. They are the ones where I was actually present in the ordinary moments.

If we have started to think of a child as anxious, we may notice every moment of worry and miss the tiny flashes of courage. Not because we are bad parents. Not because we are not paying attention. Because that is what minds do…they look for evidence that confirms the story they already know.

But summer strips away the school-year context and shows you a different version of your child. One that does not always fit neatly into the story you have been carrying since September.

Optimism as a muscle you build over time, not a personality trait you either have or do not. That reframe matters. Because it means it is available to all of us. Including on the days when it does not come easily.

This does not mean we need to be endlessly positive. That would be exhausting, and not especially honest. It means we can help children see that more than one thing can be true at the same time.