Letting Go of What Drained You Last Year
“There are things we carry that are no longer ours to hold.”
– David Whyte
Happy New Year!
As we step into 2026, the world is full of “new year, new me” messages—vision boards, resolutions, inspirational quotes everywhere you look. And while those can be motivating, they can also create pressure. A fresh start doesn’t magically erase what we’re carrying from the months (or years) before.
So instead of pretending the slate is suddenly clean, let’s tell the truth:
We all bring something into the New Year—habits, patterns, beliefs, fears, relationships, expectations, unfinished healing, unfinished conversations, and unfinished growth.
The real work is deciding what actually deserves to come with us. Because not everything does.
Positive Discipline teaches us to be kind and firm at the same time—and this applies not only to how we treat others, but also how we treat ourselves.
Being kind means giving yourself grace for the things that were hard last year.
Being firm means acknowledging what’s no longer working and making a choice to shift it.
And here’s another non-sugarcoated truth: Some things we carried in 2025 were heavy because we avoided dealing with them.
Some were heavy because they were never ours to carry in the first place. And some are heavy because they matter—and we need to carry them with more intention.
This year isn’t asking you to become a different person. It’s asking you to be a more aware one.
Choosing what to carry doesn’t require a dramatic life overhaul. It looks like small, intentional decisions:
Saying no more honestly.
Asking for help before you hit burnout.
Setting boundaries even when they feel uncomfortable.
Letting go of guilt you were never meant to hold.
Making space for rest without apologizing.
Keeping commitments that align with your values, not your fears.
These aren’t glamorous steps. They’re not “vision-board-worthy.” But they build a grounded year—not a perfect one, a real one.
Three Questions to Ask Yourself Before Carrying Anything into 2026
1. “Is this helping me grow or keeping me stuck?”
Be brutally honest.
Some habits comfort us but don’t serve us. Some beliefs feel familiar but limit us.
Growth requires letting go of patterns we’ve outgrown—even if they once protected us.
2. “Am I keeping this because it’s mine—or because someone expects it of me?”
Sometimes we carry responsibilities that aren’t actually ours.
Adults do this. Parents do this. Teachers do this.
Carrying what belongs to someone else leads to resentment, burnout, and emotional exhaustion.
3. “If I carry this into 2026, what will it cost me?”
Everything we choose to hold has a cost—time, energy, attention, emotional space.
Some things are worth the investment.
Some things drain us so deeply that they prevent us from showing up for what actually matters.
You do not need to transform yourself to have a meaningful 2026.
You simply need to choose—intentionally, gently, firmly—what is worth carrying forward. Everything else? You’re allowed to put it down.
Wishing you a grounded, courageous, and clear New Year. May 2026 hold space for exactly who you’re becoming.
Alongside this week’s blog, we’ve created a free reflection guide to help you slow down and name the season you’re actually in. If the new year feels unclear or heavy, this guide gives you space to pause before deciding what comes next.
👉 Download the free guide and take a few minutes to check in with yourself.
If you also missed the previous series about Wintering and maybe reread the series with fresh eyes—you’re welcome to start here or you can start from the beginning of this series.
👉 Read the first part of Wintering blog
You don’t have to rush into the new year.
You just have to notice what feels true—and take the step that fits the season you’re in.
Wishing you a warm and joyful New Year! See you in 2026 :)
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