Shared Agreements are collaboratively created guidelines that reflect everyone’s voice and values. When kids help create the agreements, they feel a sense of ownership. And ownership increases cooperation.

When we invite kids to be part of the process—when we shift from controlling to collaborating, we give them a sense of belonging and significance. These are the two core needs Positive Discipline reminds us to meet if we want to see lasting behavior change.

When a child is dysregulated—angry, anxious, overwhelmed—they’re not choosing to ignore you. Their brain is choosing survival. And in that state, learning is biologically impossible.